Have you ever had a plain old grouchy day? Have you ever repetitiously replayed an argument with a friend in your head? Do you sometimes get hit with the blahs or blues and have a hard time shaking it off?
Have you ever considered that you have the power to turn those challenges around and create a positive mindset?
All of these states of mind, grouchiness, rumination, and feeling blue are part of being human. Everyone experiences one or all of these states now and then. However, we also have the power to do something about it.
From personal experience, I know this to be true. Once upon a time, I tended to be worried and anxious. I imagined all kinds of disaster fantasies that would never come true.
Why did I do this? I don’t know, and it doesn’t matter. That was just the way my brain, at that time, tended to drift. However, as I became more aware of this not so positive mindset, I realized that I didn’t particularly appreciate how it felt emotionally or physically. I was not too fond of how I showed up in my friendships. I didn’t like how I treated myself.
Through a process of time, thoughtfulness, and attention, I changed my mindset.
Though it was once thought that only children’s brains learned new ideas well, current research suggests that people of any age can retrain their brains.
If you occasionally feel “monkey mind,” anxiety, or the blues, remember that you can change your thought patterns if you choose to. It takes work, and it requires replacing the current thoughts with something else more positive.
Don’t let the title fool you. The steps are simple. However, taking action on them required diligence and work. I’m not selling a quick fix that manifests a positive mindset tomorrow. Instead, I’m offering suggestions that I know will work if you want them to; if you take action.
The First Step to Changing Your Mindset is Acknowledging Your Thoughts
Creating a positive mindset or happier outlook—whatever you want to call it—arises from acknowledging that you have a choice about what is going on in your head.
You can choose to rehash that argument with your friend last week mentally. You can choose to be anxious about your upcoming review.
You can choose to be angry about current affairs. However, all of these mental states are your choice.
Realizing that you DO have a choice in what occupies your mind, that you CAN turn off the auto-pilot, is the first step to adopting a positive mindset.
Awareness is the key. It is the first step.
Create a Positive Mindset by Recognizing Negative Stories as They Arise
Recognizing negative stories as they’re happening requires you to be present.
Present moment awareness, sometimes called mindfulness, is useful for many reasons. Staying in the present helps you cultivate an awareness of when your mind begins to spin out of control.
When your mind spins, it becomes easy to create stories about the future or wallow in the past.
The past is in the past. Learn from experience. Make notes, mental or otherwise, on how to do better in the future. Once that’s done, let the story go. Stop ruminating. The future is in the future. Thoughtful planning is necessary and beneficial. However, if you start creating disaster stories, you’re no longer planning but creating unnecessary anxiety. You spend emotional and mental energy worrying non-stop about the next disaster.
When you notice you’re spinning stories in your head, check-in with yourself to see if you feel peaceful or anxious. If these stories lead to discontent, acknowledge them—rather than suppressing or denying them—and put them to rest.
The following breathing exercise can be practiced at any time anywhere. If you’re stuck in a negative thought cycle, break the cycle by taking a few deep breaths. Inhale for a count of four, then hold your breath for a count of four. Exhale for a count of four, then hold your breath for a count of four. Repeat this cycle a few times as necessary. This simple breathing exercise acts as a reboot for your mind.
Shift into a Positive Mindset by Noticing Sensations in the Body
Noticing bodily sensations also requires present moment awareness.
When we get caught up in our minds, we sometimes forget to pay attention to our bodies. However, your body can tell you quite a bit about how you’re doing in general.
Take a moment, right now, to notice how your body feels.
Do you feel tension or discomfort anywhere? Where are you feeling most relaxed? How does your belly feel? How deep or shallow is your breathing? Many people often go through an entire day or week without paying attention to their bodies at all. However, bodies accurately indicate our emotional and mental state.
Over time, with practice, I’ve learned to identify how different emotions feel in my body. A while back, I received some upsetting news. Immediately my belly knotted up, which for me represents anger. However, during the next day, as I listened to my body, I realized that what I thought was anger was actually sadness instead. Intellectually I didn’t make the connection; I needed the wisdom of my body to help me understand what was going on.
This awareness of emotions in the body is something you can learn and practice as well. It takes time, but when mastered, it is a valuable skill.
The next time you notice you’re feeling butterflies in your stomach, or tension in your shoulders, notice your thoughts. If you’re stressed out or worried, return to step two and practice the breathing exercise. See if that helps.
Support a Positive Mindset by Going Outside and Connecting With Nature
Going outside is another excellent way of breaking a negative mental cycle and improve how our bodies feel.
Get some fresh air. Take a walk. Connect with something growing.
Get a bit of sunshine, or breeze, or gentle rain on your face.
Whether you live near a forest, in the city, near a park, or the water, look for something green and alive. Listen to the birds. Notice the temperature and humidity.
Focusing your attention on nature and life outside of yourself is an excellent method of shifting a grouchy mood into a positive mindset.
Doing Something Kind for Someone Else Kickstarts a Positive Mindset
The last tip for shifting into a positive mindset is to create a connection with something or someone. Extending kindness to another gets you out of your mind.
The act of making someone else happy, offering a little bit of compassion to another, innately helps you feel better about yourselves.
Smile and say hello to someone. Hold a door for someone. Snuggle your dog when she wants attention.
These actions help you move beyond yourself. They help you create a connection with the world around you.
Choose one or all of these tips and take action today. Repeat them tomorrow. Repeat these actions for a week and then a month. When practiced, these simple techniques help you develop a positive mindset and help you cultivate peace of mind and joy.
If you’d like to explore these ideas further and learn how to integrate them into everyday life, join me for an International Spiritual Tour where we’ll spend 10-14 days practicing compassion meditation, qigong, and tools to create a positive mindset, or sign up for a Cultivating Mindful Compassion course or Yi Jin Jing for Vitality.
Lastly, If I can be of any help or answer any questions, or if you’d simply like to discuss what program is the best fit for you, contact me to schedule a time to chat.
